Just me...

I hate email.

I just got back from lunch. I don't recommend crying and driving, but it has usually worked for me - just getting away from the pc, from the office, from the phone and turning up the radio and driving in some direction before turning around at a halfway point to turn back.

I feel the weight of the world in the middle of my heart. I've hurt so many people. It's not fair that I sent that email last week, and it's not fair that it was so hurtful. I am so sorry. In trying to be "noble and honorable" on the outside, I took everything way too deep inside - and when it came out and was accidently sent to the world, it was too much to hold back, too much to forgive, too much for which to apologize. I cried and cried, driving east on I-20, headed nowhere except through a place where I could cry and cry out and not disturb anyone else... not hurt anyone else.

It's not fair that one email has done so much irreparable damage, or that it's torn open so large a wound. I hurt, and I have hurt others. I am so sorry.